Posted by: Jim E | October 19, 2017

Seven Months…Seems Longer…We Miss Jeremy…But Still, At Peace…

It almost seems impossible, not that seven months have gone by…but impossible that Jeremy is really gone…he still seems to be “around”, if you know what I mean…because he was always around…our minds play tricks on us from time to time…when we go out in the car, in our minds we think of Jeremy and if he wants to go or if he is ready…it only lasts a split second, but it is real…we do think that way…it is sort of understandable I guess…Jeremy, Mom and Dad 40th birthday

The truth is, I don’t want it to go away…I suppose it will but we are not wishing for that…it really doesn’t interfere with our lives, but a pleasant feeling comes with our thoughts of Jeremy…he was a wonderful son, a wonderful person…fun to have around, with a great sense of humor…he saw life a lot like me, I suppose…and I see the world that way too…we laughed more than we cried…if it looks by the pictures I post here, like we have and had a happy home…you would be right, and Jeremy made so much of it so…and so still from him, there’s laughter in our walls…

This morning, when Judie reminded me this was the seventh month anniversary of Jeremy’s passing…and a little later, something came up…I was kidding Judie about something…we were laughing about it…and I said, “Jeremy would agree with me about that…he would be laughing too.”…Judie had to agree…he had a sense of humor…it got him through many times of his life…even when he was going in for surgery, his ability to find something humorous to say, in the midst of what could have been a more stressful situation…he made is easier to go through the experience…

Like his surgery at Mayo in about 2011…we were waiting in this huge staging area…lots of patients, because there are many operating rooms in the hospital…it was wall to wall patients…all prepped for surgery…we talked together, we prayed together, talked about the tumor that had to come out of his jaw, and talked some more…finally, Jeremy broke the ice…he said: “Let’s get this show on the road. Let’s get this thing out.”…we laughed…and we did…well, Dr. Keller got “this thing out”, it turned out to be cancerous…and few hours later, Jeremy was at Culver’s having a “Butter Burger, fries and Coke”…an amazing kid…hey, he ate on the other side…

What have we learned though all of this…I imagine you know we have relived this whole experience with Jeremy, over the last seven months, many times…there have been ups and downs, we have thought maybe we could have changed the outcome by something we missed…or could we have done more, maybe better…but in the end, we realize that none of that kind of thinking is very healthy, because none of that will bring him back…and in fact the way things had been going, Jeremy would not have liked what was coming…

Jeremy, Mom and Dad025

Since his first stroke in 2014, as we looked back over those years, he was having more and more trouble with all kinds of physical things…we were immersed in all of it, and could not see anything but helping Jeremy…but there were signs telling us that he was more and more fragile, and things could not continue for long this way…even people who we contacted, like Social Security, told us that this would become too much for us…but we just carried on…Jeremy knew more than we did concerning how it was…and in the end, he called the shots better than we did…he knew he was dying, but didn’t want to hurt us…we tried to encourage him, he just was at peace with his situation…so he was really helping us to the place were we could deal with his death…it was indeed something to behold…

So Jeremy’s seventh month anniversary of sorts, October 19, 2017, is upon us and will pass to other 19th of another month, as the year goes along…and his favorite time of the year, Thanksgiving, Christmas…we will not just celebrate him on those days…because we are honoring him with our lives, everyday…as he would want and expect us to do…and with a dollop of humor added to the mix…

Jeremy and clown at KrogerSo Jeremy, here’s to you…the one who really defined our lives…and was a great example of how life should be lived…one with courage, dedication, honesty, trustworthy, with goodness, and wholesome living…living a life pleasing to his God…with a large splash of humor…Jeremy is loved and honored here…

 

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